It's time to write about how lucky I am, because I need a reminder.
Now of course we'd all like to be independently wealthy without the need to work for a living at all. You know, those lottery dreams. I am not THAT lucky. And job-wise I had kind of a rocky road for a while, after having worked 18 (that's EIGHTEEN) years for the same marketing company and getting into a golden-handcuff kind of a rut. That job moved me and my belongings AND horse from Massachusetts to Utah when they opened a small office there. I could've easily worked there till retirement. Then 9/11 occurred and cuts had to be made, among them the small Utah office.
I was in love with the West and didn't want to go "back home". So I took a job in Washington with the VLSC (very large software company). To their credit they too moved me, belongings and horse from Utah. But it was a bad fit, at least the job I landed in. After 14 months we parted ways.
I started freelancing with the company I had spent 18 years with, and I got involved with a project that ironically had the VLSC as a client. It was right up my alley -- loads of technical database marketing detail, the type that causes most people's eyes to roll back in their head. After a year (during which I acquired unhandled PMU horses and had no insurance), the VLSC moved this project from my old agency to a new one. The folks at the new agency faced all of the technical detail with more than the average amount of eye-rolling.
Suddenly I was desirable. I could do for new agency what I'd been doing for the old, making sense of the data morass. Thus I was able to get some "considerations" -- I did NOT have to move to San Francisco where new agency is headquartered. I did not, in fact, have to work in an office at all. I could work from home on the farm and have full benefits. I leapt.
And there I remain. I have no commute, which becomes more and more wonderful with each passing dollar per gallon. I have no work wardrobe (scary, really). I enjoy what I do and I'm valued for it.
And then there are weeks like this one. Sometimes there is more to be done than is humanly possible. My remoteness makes communication among peers difficult, especially so when I'm floundering under unattainable demands. I have some major gaps in understanding and information critical to what needs to be done NOW. So I have to remember that there are valleys to match the peaks, and I will surely get out from under this stress. And it's really just irony, not a vendetta against me, that landed this particular peak right in the midst of foalwatch.
No I haven't ridden or worked with any of my @#$% horses this week. I feel guilty and cranky and exhausted. I'm not sleeping well, even between the ringings of the alarm that tell me it's time to glance at the fat mare on the foalcam again. I don't need any more obstacles than I already have, because I am not good at overcoming obstacles.
But I AM lucky... aren't I? I guess I'm opening myself up to hear about those of you who drive four hours a day (uphill both ways) and STILL come home and ride 6-8 horses (and work out... and volunteer... and... blah). But I deserve it I suppose! Come on, shame me, LOL. Maybe that'll work.